Giant Grey Phallus Tells Us What We Already Suspected

Ex-children's-show host and Kiwiana icon Thingee has announced his homosexuality at a press conference this morning. Commentators have criticised the timing of his revelation, claiming that such openness comes only after the death of his television career.

Thingee co-hosted various shows with Jason Gunn throughout the late eighties and nineties. Rumours romantically linking the two were rife, but were assiduously denied by the pair.

"Jason is, and always has been, just a friend," said Thingee during this morning's press conference. "As a puppet, I've had many hands up my arse, but none of them were ever his."

Thingee follows in a proud tradition of LGBTQ representation in TVNZ children's programming, with Play School's Big Ted and Little Ted being a pioneering queer couple on the Kiwi small screen.

Wellywood gossip suggests that Thingee and Good Morning's Steve Gray are something of an item, but the duo are staying close-lipped on the subject. Watch the following clip and make up your own minds, Dear Readers. Thrill as Thingee bitches about Good Night Kiwi, discusses his future in 'adult television', and (around the 3 minute mark) makes an indecent proposal on live television.